prettyredshoes

peculiarities in singledom, part uno. | August 1, 2009

I think I’ve been seriously neglecting this blog. Oops. This has been a busy summer. Busier than I thought it would be. I think that no matter where I go or what I do with my life, time will always be measured around the school calender. All life events occur in semesters. I’m always looking forward to a summer, winter or spring break.

In the month of May, I took like five mini-trips. I basically stayed gone the whole month. In June, I taught two classes and took a seminar in comic cinema. I really enjoyed falling in love with Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton and studying the visual arts instead of the written, but I was super busy. I went to class at 8, then taught for two hours, then lunch, then office hours, then homework for class, then preparing lesson plans / grading papers, then bed. For the entire month, I didn’t make any progress on unpacking my apartment. I didn’t see anyone, and I really didn’t do anything. I did start going to the gym. We can count that as win.

In July, I went to Mexico. More about that in another blog.

My reason for recapping my summer is to say that here I sit. The entire summer has passed me by, and I am just now unboxing and unpacking my things. I’m always hesitant to warm up to new places, even places I like. Being completely settled in, in some strange way, will signify both my independence and my loneliness.

It’s one thing to be single and to live with a roommate, and it is quite another thing, I have found, to live alone and be single. Contemplating this has led to a series of thoughts I like to refer to as peculiarities in singledom.

Last month, I had an opportunity to learn the mechanics of a toilet. I say opportunity so as to try to seem like the optimist. No only did my toilet overflow, but it also did this thing where it ran continuously. Now, if this has happened to you before, you know that it really is not that hard to fix, but it was new to me. I fixed my toilet and felt like a born-again high school blonde scoring high on the ASVAB. Anyway, at any other point in my life, someone would have fixed that for me. A boyfriend, a roommate, my father. But when you rent a one bedroom apartment, you inherit a heap of your own problems. It’s like an adventure, or that is what I will tell myself until something serious breaks.

Also, movie rentals. In relationships, renting a movie meant quality time. Now, I go to rent a movie because I am going to pull my hair out if I don’t go seek out entertainment. A person can only do so much cleaning and schoolwork before a break is needed. AND I have literally seen everything on TV or it’s nothing but bad TV. I refuse to watch Roseanne at 4pm. Roseanne is exclusively reserved for 2am.

To be clear, I am in a vacation period of sorts. I still have responsibilities and whatnot, but I do not start work and school until August 17th. Several of my friends are out of town, and I have been sick. These are the reasons for my being home A LOT recently.

Also, now that I am single (not that my being single is a new development), my organizational methods have gone from adequate to obsessive. For instance, here’s a book…. its goes on the bookshelf. That was old Christie. Now, I divide my books into very specific sections. Is it a reference book, a book of fiction, poetry, new age? If poetry, is it English or American? 20th century? It is criticism or an anthology? Something tells me that I have too much alone time on my hands. Of course, now it’s worse because I’ve discovered library booksales. I can now buy 20 books for like 7 dollars, but then I am faced with such problems as what shelf should I put my handbook for chess players or my dictionary of legal terms?

Also, almost all of my close girlfriends started dating a guy this past year so now I am the perpetual third wheel. It’s fine, most of the time– until the moment happens– the moment when you have to watch them consciously rediscover their affection for one another. This usually happens after a meal, and then it is time for the third wheel to spin home.

Anyway, I think my singledom has gone from amateur to professional. I like it, most days.. even prefer it. On the days I might doubt that, I remember 11thstreet. Would I want to be back there, again? Is being involved with someone worth that kind of compromise? Nah, I’ll wait.